Dear Isaac

Dear Isaac,

(Or Samson as I may start calling you because of your freakish strength and screams this morning when I tried to trim your hair)

It is amazing to me that you are 29 months today.

Oh, the places you have been and the places you have yet to go.

As I watch you grow, and more about your personality and spirit is uncovered, I am even more a believer that our traits are predetermined and neutral in nature. We (and others) are the ones who assign those traits positive or negative meaning, but as you mature, only you can choose how to direct your behavior using those characteristics.

Your stubbornness, or strength of conviction, is not a trait that needs to be broken as others believe, but instead can be a gift that if channeled towards positive goals will be an important life skill.

Your knack for getting into everything, or your inquisitive nature, can lead to you uncovering many unanswered questions if you realize the power of developing this ability and using it to find answers that help the common good.

Your melt-downs, or sensitivity and true connection to your feelings, can foster more empathy and understanding about others and aid you in building positive relationships. (And believe me, your planned ‘performances’ just for the comedy do not go unnoticed by me, and will help you diffuse many uncomfortable situations.)

So as your grandparents, aunts, uncles and strangers give me the stink eye when they witness you falling to the floor with emotion, saying ‘no’ on occasion to establish some authority in your own life, wearing a gold lame jacket to school with two different shoes, getting pretty pissed when I tell you ‘no’, and questioning me starting you on time-outs at 16 months, I need to remind myself that they all have amnesia of once being or having a child behaving the same way even though they will surely deny it and continue to judge me no matter what I do.

No worries, my son, I will take all those hits for you. (I just wish that your timing for such displays was not always when it is you and I in a large public place – Mama does still on occasion care what others think.)

I do know that we need to continue to work on learning that ‘there is a time and place for everything’, and that emotional outbursts can be thwarted and channeled into outdoor adventures or artistic pursuits as well, but hopefully one day you will thank me for not jumping on the bandwagon to rob you of your individuality and break your spirit in your second year.

Lord knows there are enough folks who will line up to do that soon enough.

Instead I hope to teach you to recognize, foster and use your talents in the most constructive ways, and instill in you that your traits are yours, none of them are negative unless you choose and use them to be, and to remember that those who give you the hardest time about them, are usually the ones who are not staying true or using their own in this way.

I love you,

Mama

 

The Giving Tree

Growing up, one of my favorite books was the Giving Tree.

I know some have a hard time finding the lesson in the story, but I remember learning about unconditional love, selfishness, happiness, sadness and finding contentment with simple things as you grow older.

It made me think about giving back, questioning my purpose, and reminded me to think of others.

All great things to learn, teach and be reminded of often.

So when I saw this tree stump near my house, I had to snap some shots.

 

Now I know that I am one to read into things and look for meaning in everything, but somehow I think Isaac did get something out of our first introduction to the Giving Tree.

 

Relay for Life

Please support my efforts to fight back against cancer by making a donation or starting your own Relay For Life® team.

My Reason to Relay

This cause is close to my heart - I watch my mother fight and beat cancer every day.

I Relay because I want to see an end to cancer during my lifetime and because I want my son to have a lot more time to make cookies with his Nonnie.

Choose your battles

We descended into the city for Isaac's cousins birthday yesterday and found ourselves at one of the quentissential American birthday parties with 4 dozen kids running around hosting their own Kentucky Derby, and pouncing on a dozen blow up amusement toys.

After the initial shock wore off from getting pounced by kids twice his age, Isaac found someone to play with.

(I am not sure if it counts as someone, since it is a plastic inanimate object, but he and his new friend were inseparable the entire party.)

Realizing that in life and especially with a toddler, you have to choose your battles, when it came time for the group photo, we found a good compromise.

We all need reminders

As I sit staring at my son sleeping, I linger wondering what the world will be like in a few months when he starts asking “why”, in a few years when he starts school; in 5 years when he really wants to learn about the way the world works, in 10 years when he wins and loses his real first battles with himself and his peers. As all parents, I wonder how I can teach him to live an accountable life, to value things other than money, to stay true to himself while respecting others, and I sit with wonder looking for signs of what paths he will chose.

I know that it is impossible to know the answers to any of these questions now, and I smile to myself knowing that it is more fun not to know.

For me, someone who over thinks EVERYTHING, the beauty of having a child is in the details.

It forces you to:

Live in the moment

View things with wonder

Remember that you need to take baby steps towards your dreams no matter how old you are

Live an authentic life if not just for you, then in the hope that your children will too

Believe that anything is possible

Consider the importance of the HOW and WHY of everything

Learn to listen

Realize that the more you push someone to do what you want, the less likely they are to do it

And understand that we are ALL still trying to learn how to navigate through life with the least bruises

Do yourself a favor; find an old photo of yourself and read the above list to yourself three times a day for a full month.  Whenever the self-defeating or voice full of doubt tries to get your attention, or you are about to make a bad decision, look at your photo and re-read the above list.

Just try it for a month and see how it changes your life.